This AWEsome Life

Over the last week I traveled twice for student film shoots. Once to Tucson & once to Flagstaff. Both quick and easy day trips that took four hours round trip that make you realize, we are not as far from the rest of the world as we may think. The sights are gorgeous and you can’t beat an Arizona Sky. As for the on camera experiences, hmm – one was a phenomenal experience and one was eh? Both were learning experiences and had completely different feelings of interest in the work. Needless to say, happy to have had the opportunities but still on the fence about what it all means. As an actor, I recognize my journey being confusing. In 2018, I was sure I wanted to do more and I did, but what I experienced made me more confused. As I tried to gain momentum with auditions & seeking an agent, I find the static moments drive me to question my intention, my ability to stay focused. I have become very undisciplined as an actor, not doing the work, not seeking the challenges and unwillingness to dedicate the time. On the other end, I am writing more and I have returned to improvisation with a vigor, trying to regain my confidence and status on stage among my peers, in my community. Recognizing more how to meld my improvisors mind with my newly honed acting skills and excited to show off my talent in that regard. This is a great thing, as recent events & pathways of life have created an odd cliff of this life’s focus. A recognition of letting go and moving forward, at first, to do so meant letting go of my commitment to improv in Phoenix as a leader, creator and community facilitator. I have certainly recognized that I have a knack for management and as such, I got under the thumb of being a producer, juggling multiple hats and eventually neglecting the artist in me. It’s hard at this time in life, near 40 to decide I want to be an artist, let alone unsure what kind, someway, somehow. I can create, but sharing is where I fall short… This is where I get over that, this platform, the internet, building our own websites, gives us a voice, whether people find it interesting or not, it is a vulnerability, a start at that which makes us individual artists worthy of recognition.


Happy trails!

My Record Obsession

This is a new thing, fairly new, less than a years in hand, just over a year in thought – and I would be withholding a great mighty detail if I didn’t share that Martin Freeman had a major to do on this new joy of my life. I grew up with a record player and my dad kept a few amazing records that shaped my taste for music. Music is a thing, and although always a part of my life, never the life saver that others speak so highly of. However, in 2017 I felt as though I woke up a little, as if I had jumped on a train to stop at a certain station of my life and I fell asleep. Now I’ve gone too far and I have to figure out who I am in this new undiscovered land of my life. When I woke up on this train, I realized the feeling I had, the adventure, joy and excitement of the life I was living had the volume turned down, while I was maybe, taking life too seriously. Anyway, through the rabbit hole of the internet and a small interest in the question; “who is Martin Freeman” I found many interviews, etc on his love for music and his record collection. Due to similar tastes in music I started to listen to music more, spent more time dancing and singing and overall – smiling, taking in life from my tippy toes more. I found myself longing for a record player and the opportunity to get away from digital playlists and back to the experience of discovering an album and the hands on joy of touching the music as one does with a record. And my husband, as amazing as he is, listening to me for six months, knowing Martin Freeman inspired it and bought me my first ever record player for my 39th Birthday last year. As a general collector of things, I took to building my record collection pretty quickly and now, with Sam’s help – we have a nice base collection. I keep up with a wish list and can’t wait to add more while also staying mindful of over indulging. In due time and with little to no financial concern. Happy listening to all you other music & vinyl lovers out there. I post a lot of random & some re-occurring stuff (like cats), but often vinyl – follow @goldtoothe on instagram.